Thursday, June 14, 2007

pilates = bad idea

A friend has been singing the praises of pilates for over a year now. “Take a class! You’ll love it!” She encourages. But I have issues with coordination, and some serious baggage with aerobics classes that make me feel klutzy.
“Oh, it’s not like that at all,” my friend assures me. “It’s nothing like aerobics.”
She almost had me convinced. Almost. Looking over the schedule at the Y, I almost did it. But I am so glad I didn’t.

Instead, I checked out some pilates videos at the library. And, let me tell you, they require coordination and abdominal muscles I do not have. I realize that’s the point, but seriously folks. It’s bad.

I have reached new levels of humility with these videos while the noisy boys either flawlessly complete every move while shouting out, “Come on, Mom! It’s fun!” or critique me from the couch, “Don’t just lay there. Lift up those legs! You can do it! CAN you do it, Mom?” and questions I do not wish to answer like, “What’s a firm buttocks?” Oh, yeah. They do not need any more vocabulary to add to their repertoire of body-part humor.

I’m just glad I’m in the house with the curtains closed and not at the YMCA.

19 comments:

L at the Redhouse said...

I am with you! Pilates should only be done under cover of dark with the blinds closed... pilates tend to just be a harsh reminder of all I no longer am! But really, who needs firm abs? It is much more comfy for a two year old to snuggle into flab than a six pack!

MamaToo said...

I did pilates when Obi-1 was pretty young (6 months?). I agree, it would be bad news to make me do that in public. However, the class was at a friend's home (in her living room!). She gathered a bunch of moms together & hired a private pilates teacher. Because of the group, it was cheap per class, but knowing that everyone else was in the same boat, and not having to go anywhere while babies played beside us = priceless.

L.L. Barkat said...

LOVE the commentary. (Solution? Get them down there on the floor with you.... of course, then you'd have to watch out for wayward body parts coming your direction!)

Llama Momma said...

L -- Thanks for stopping by! Hey, my neighbor has a red house, but her name starts with S, not L. Hmmm....

mamatoo -- babies and exercise are very compatible. But when they start talking, good grief! It's humiliating!

LL -- Oh yeah. They love getting down on the floor with me (and are much more coordinated than I am!)

My favorite video to do with them is "Walk Away the Pounds." They love it and get marching around the house saying, "Oh yeah! Feel the burn!" (As if they need more exercise...those boys run from sun up to sun down. I can barely keep them fed as it is...)

Craver Vii said...

Does anyone still do the Richard Simmons workouts?

Llama Momma said...

Who's Richard Simmons?

spaghettipie said...

Can you believe Richard Simmons still looks the same today as he did 30 years ago...and still wearing the same sparkley, too short outfits, too?

I haven't tried Pilates (although I've been intrigued), but I have a dance workout video that I get a kick out of. It's fun to do, but I'm pretty sure I look like a moron. I haven't done it since my daughter started talking though...haven't really thought about that part!

Love the new look, by the way.

Llama Momma said...

SP - Thanks! I decided since I'm sticking with this blog thing, it was time to spiff things up a bit! :-)

Craver Vii said...

I wonder if they made a DVD of that comic opera from the 80's: The Pilates of Penzance. Arrrr!

Yes, great new look, LM. Green is definitely you.

Spaghettipie, after the picture you just put up of your daughter, you're afraid that she might embarrass YOU??

Llama Momma said...

thanks, Craver! :-)

And you know I was just kidding about Richard Simmons, right? Who hasn't heard of Richard Simmons? Those sparkly pants and DEAL A MEAL. The good ol' days!

I wonder where he is now?

TJ Wilson said...

I laughed out loud at this one... I, too, have boys who cheer me on from the sofa, and I absolutely know what you mean about body part humor. Loved laughing tonight...

Llama Momma said...

TJ - Always glad to provide laughter! The body-part humor is quite the thing, isn't it? With three boys, I can expect it to get worse before it gets better, I'm sure!

L at the Redhouse said...

Do you really not know who I am?? You have spent many Friday nights at the Redhouse eating, laughing and praying! Miss seeing you!

Llama Momma said...

L -- got it! I still had to think about it. Duh!

Okay. What are you talking about with the flab? Where is it, girl? You've got no flab!!

L at the Redhouse said...

The flab is just streeeeeetched over another 8 or 9 inches of height! Being 5'8" makes it less noticable to the casual observer... but for those in the know... ugh!

It is my turn to get "in shape" tho'. My hubby just finished the Horribly Hilly bike ride in WI (200K) and has lost about 20 lbs in the process! I've got some catching up to do!

spaghettipie said...

C - Are you insinuating that I would ever embarrass my child?

LM - I saw Richard Simmons on Martha not that long ago and he looks exactly the same. I think he may have even been promoting a video...

Llama Momma said...

That is too wild about Richard Simmons. He must still be selling videos if he's hanging out with Martha! I should see if the library has any...just to see what the noisy boys would say!

Char said...

Pilates = very very bad idea!

I joined one by mistake a year or so ago. First and last time I ever ran into a class unprepared. First and last time I ran into a class. Period. There was this one "position" where you lie flat on your back, with your legs are 45 degrees, holding the big bouncy ball firmly between the arches of your feet. Then you heave, ho, lift your feet up, keeping your legs straight, mind you!, hoist them up and over your head and attempt to touch the ground BEHIND your head, while still keeping the ball firmly held between the arches of my feet. Needless to say, my ball launched out from between my feet and bounced through the class, landing on a few people in the process. Need I say more?

Llama Momma said...

Char -- Oh yeah. That sounds bad! Who comes up with this stuff? (Or more importantly, who can actually do it??)

Thanks for stopping by. :-)