Monday, September 8, 2008

the one where I talk about sex

Cameras were everywhere on that first day of school. Parents hovered like the paparazzi, snapping photos and waving. And when the kids went in, the crowd dissolved into a mixture of tears and happy dances.

(I was one of the Moms doing a happy dance, by the way.)

As we walked home, I chatted with neighbor, who had taken the day off work to commemorate the day. Her husband is a stay-at-home Dad.

“What will you do with your day?” I asked. Both of her kids were in school all day for the first time.

“Oh, I don’t know,” she said.

“You can go to lunch! You can take a nap! You can have loud sex during the day!” I joked.

“Now why would we want to do that?” She asked, as if I had suggested pulling her toenails out one at a time.

To keep romance alive. Because your husband looks good to a lot of bored housewives on this playground. Because you can. I think all of these things as we part ways.

In our sex-saturated culture, it seems that married sex is an oxymoron.

Chrysalis is hosting a conversation today on Marriage and Romance.

After eleven years of marriage, I’ve got a few things to say about romance and how it evolves and changes over the years, especially when children come along. But I’ll keep my advice short and sweet: one way to keep romance alive in your marriage is to have more sex.

(This is the part of my blog where I try to forget that my dad reads it. And my grandpa.)

But really. Next time your husband winks at you across the dinner table, don’t roll your eyes. Wink back. Marriage is not meant to be a miserable endeavor. Flirt. Have fun. Have sex. And see if the romance meter in your home rises.

24 comments:

Denise said...

Amen, keep the fire lit.

Lori said...

This is the part of my blog where I try to forget that my dad reads it. And my grandpa.)


You had me LOL at this. Amen and Amen!! Hee, Hee

Lori

Greg C said...

I can't comment on my blog because my sister, brother, daughter and oldest son read mine. I think they all suspect that we still do "it". I get the eye rolling reaction from my wife.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to know what you think about the married couples having sex EVERY DAY!!! Have you heard about that? who has the time?? or energy? but the couples who participated said it really strengthened their relationship! thoughts?

Llama Momma said...

Anon -- I read about that awhile ago. I think they're crazy, honesty. But maybe I'm just in a different stage of life???

Connie Marie said...

SOOOO! This is what romance is!!!! lol
I remember when I was 30, and my sister in law came over to me during our Christmas morning festivities at my Mother and Father in laws home and whispered in my ear... "do you two still do it?" hahaha
Now we are in our 50's and... I would have to answer yes, does it ever end? lol
Thanks for sharing, ha!

terra said...

amen, amen, and brava!

so well put! thanks for the reminder, even if you have to be a little uncomfortable that dad and gramps mighta read it...

clearly this is not a problem at our house. we have the opposite problem. maybe next post you could talk about BIRTHCONTROL while having all this unmitigated sex...

just kiddin.

keep it real homeslice. keep preachin these words from the lord.

you do a heart good.

Llama Momma said...

Terra -- AND my father-in-law...can't forget him! ;-)

Marmot Mom said...

I think your dad and your grandfather will be very proud of you today. Love, M

Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog said...

Great honest post! It is what we need to hear.
Blessings,
Angela

e-Mom said...

BRAVO. I'm cheering right along with the rest of your commenters!

Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Llama Mama.

Blessings,
e-Mom :~D

Anonymous said...

I want to know why this post came when Lamma Papa is gone!

Robyn A. said...

I couldn't agree more. I didn't have the nerve to say this on my post even though I know it's true. I'm married to a pastor and members of our older generation congregation read my blog. Can you imagine the scandal if said "SEX?" :)

Why is this concept so hard for us girl to understand? I dunno...

Nice meeting another "Robyn" out in bloggy land. You even spell yours right!!

The Oho Report said...

Llama Momma,
Thanks for your honesty and humor, I loved it.

Llama Momma said...

Anon -- HA! Pure coincidence, I'm sure! ;-)

~michelle pendergrass said...

More sex is always good!! LOL

Peculiar said...

Well Llama Mamma, you said it--the "s" word, and honey, you posted right. I alluded to it on my post, and I wasn't trying to be x-rated or anything of the sort on mine, just like you weren't. I can't remember if I actually said the word, but it's obvious that that's what I was talking about. I'll have to go back and see if I actually said it, but one thing is for sure, I'm not ashamed of it.

God allowed and was the designer of the act to happen between male and female, and there are many great reasons for it. Why shouldn't we talk about it in a positive, natural, loving, God-honoring way?

Your post was short and very sweet indeed!! Thanks for posting what you did. My husband often says that the only thing he is worried about, when it comes to sex, is whether he is going to be able to function the same way or at least to some degree when he turns 70 or 80, because he wants to be available to me sexually for as long as he can. You go Hubby!!

Though I'm quite satisfied with close intimacy, I do enjoy my husband sexually.

The Oho Report said...

Llama Momma,
I want to put your post in my blog, refering it to you. Is that OK? I tried to tag it and my internet "Covenant Eyes" software blocked it, you used a word they didn't like.

Llama Momma said...

Otto -- link away! And change any language that needs to be changed.

23 degrees said...

Preach it, sista!!

(And this may be the week to drink more cranberry juice, too.)

LOVE this post.

spaghettipie said...

You completely crack me up! Love the post. Email me sometime and remind me to tell you about the Secret Box Party. :) I've thought about writing a book on it one day . . .ha!

MiPa said...

"Marriage is not meant to be a miserable endeavor."
AMEN! Thanks for your honesty and candor. It is refreshing!

NaNcY said...

looks like good advice to me!

Sweet Mummy said...

AWESOME Advice! This is a fun and excellent post. Thanks for sharing.